How To Stop Complaining in 6 Steps (Break the habit)

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I’m Harsh Agrawal

Blog Scientist & a passionate blogger. Love minimalist life & talk about things that matter. Adventure from heart & doer by action.

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The more you complain about your problems, the more problems you will have to complain about.  

Zig Ziglar

As we were landing into the middle of another year, like everybody else, I did some retrospection and re-evaluated my last year’s journey.

I thought about how it’d be the perfect time to start making the changes I wanted to make a few weeks ago/last month/last year. When I brooded about one habit which I wanted to improve upon and change, the first thing that came into my mind was to stop complaining.

As mindful as I strive to be with my words, I always end up complaining. Whether it’s the weather, my job, clothes, relationships, worldly situations, traffic, high prices, etc. (The list goes on…)

Have you ever thought about the amount of time you spend complaining in a day?

The thing is, we have made ourselves so miserable that we end up finding fault and blaming others for our current situation.

Think about it:

  • Has complaining solved any of your problems?

When we complain about things to our family, friends, or spouse, we only bring negative energy into our lives. The energy which we invest in complaining, if invested in something positive, can transform our lives and make us happier.

So this year, I challenged myself to stop complaining and see what happens.

I knew that complaining was a habit and it would take a little bit of time to break. But there was one thing I knew for sure: Habits can be broken with will power and consistency.

Well, it’s been 2 months since I have started practicing the art of not complaining and guess what, I have been pretty successful.

Of course, I cannot say that I’ve never complained in the past 2 months. I did a few times, but it’s OK as I am still on the path to breaking a bad habit and inculcating a good one.

How To Stay Complaining for good:

1. Express Gratitude

I have often found myself worrying about things which I don’t have rather than focusing on the things which I do have.

This year I decided to say more phrases like, “Thank you”, “I appreciate your help”, “Congratulations”, or simply just acknowledge the fact of how lucky I am to be alive.

Of course, it takes some time to become grateful sub-consciously, so I started setting micro-goals instead of macro goals.

Every morning, I wake up feeling thankful of what I have and remind myself to be more grateful than the previous day, thus slowly building the habit.

Express Gratitude meme

Related Read: Do These 5 Things & You Will Be Ahead Of 99% Of The Population

2. Change Perspective

Everyone has their own story and their own way of looking at life.

By simply accepting this fact, you will notice that you are more open to people. You will be more open to life. Most importantly, you will open yourself up to possibilities you’ve never even thought of.

It’s not necessary to agree with everyone, but you can always appreciate and accept their thoughts and values. You cannot change somebody else’s attitude and perspective, but you can change yours.

I have always had a strong grasp on what I believed in and what I stood for, which of course led to clashes with the people around me.

So, I promised myself that I would listen to people more and try to understand their perspective. I must say, in the past 2 months, I have been able to look at the world with endless possibilities as this shift in perspective has greatly widened my horizons.

Change perspective

3. Change Complaints Into Solutions

This is the most important point for me.

Whenever I see myself complaining about anything, I ask, “What can I do to change the situation”?

If there isn’t a solution, accepting things the way are kills the urge to complain.

For example, instead of complaining that it’s cold outside and I hate living in this place, I stuff myself with woolens so that I feel warm and cozy.

Use complaints as a catalyst for positive change and positive actions. It will bring peace and happiness into your life rather than frustration.

Turn complaints to solutions

4. Dissociate From People Who Complain Too Much

Constantly listening to people who are angry, frustrated, and complain too much about family, life, and various situations only adds negative energy into your life.

It’s very important to draw a boundary line and surround yourself with people who are cheerful, grateful, and appreciative of life.

In the past couple months, I have distanced myself from people who complain a lot. It’s not that I did not meet or talk to them at all, but I did not indulge myself when people around me started whining.

When these conversations arise, I distance myself. Doing this has brought a very positive spark to my life. I feel vibrant and full of positive energy.

5. Notice How Often I Complain

By simply being consciously aware of what we say, we can notice how often we complain, and what we’re complaining about.

I started noticing when I’m complaining. Do I complain during a particular time, situation, or around particular people?

Whatever the case may be, I follow all of the above points and try to live my life to the fullest.

6. Practice Meditation & Yoga

Yoga is a positive way of life which helps you to be stress-free, healthy, and happy. It strengthens positive mental attitudes, develops focus and concentration, and increases physical (and mental) flexibility. It makes you feel alive and helps you get to know your true self.

Yoga, along with meditation, will help you tune out all of your negative thoughts and emotions. This will help you feel more connected to yourself and to the world around you.

I started practicing yoga and meditation. However, I can’t do it regularly as I always tend to run away from exercising.

I am still trying to improve on this particular point.

practice yoga

One thing which I can say for sure is that after 2 months of practicing these changes, my life has changed for the better. On the inside, I feel very happy and energized.

Of course, it’s impossible to wake up one morning and completely stop complaining, but by being mindful of what we say, we can slowly change this habit to be more happy and present in the moment.

Never forget that life is all about perspective.

Try these tips for a week and let me know: how has this improved your life?

24 comments on “How To Stop Complaining in 6 Steps (Break the habit)

  1. Thank you Shallu for the nice article! The points that you have mentioned in your article are really important. Yes, I agree complaining without any solution is not good at all. I personally do not like people who complains a lot. I have seen people who complains a lot do not get the best service. Though the service provider wants to serve the customer well, because of the over demanding nature, the service provider becomes annoyed. We really need to show gratitude and do not always complain if there is a small problem exists.Changing attitude can change a lot!

    The pictures used in this article are awesome! Could you please let me know the source from where you are getting those amazing pictures? It will help me to use some nice picture for my blog posts in future.

    Thank You.

  2. Hi Shallu,

    Thanks for this awesome article. Indeed our prospective and output on life effects our life. When we learn to change how we perceive a situation, we learn to be happier beings. Thanks again.

  3. Good article.. before yoga we used to see this picture in our gym vice-versa as Before gym & after gym….

  4. Thanks for your insights. If many people apply these techniques it would be a radical boost to our lives

  5. SHALLU, great to hear from you – and thanks for your kind words.

    Good to know your complaining is now minimal. As for your time complaint, just focus on getting one key thing each day – and see how your life transforms:-)

  6. Shallu Madam, Nice post. We want more posts from you in shoutmeloud. Thanks for sharing these great tips.

  7. Thanks, Shallu!! I was desperately waiting for such type of inspiration that could help me in growing.
    You deserve high appreciation. Thanks once again!!

    One Question. why AGRAWAL, people are so successful in blogging? 🙂

  8. Great one, thanks for posting especially I like the quote “Change complaints into solution” section. Dissociate from complaining people might be difficult, not everyone gets this opportunity, people are still there live with that.

  9. Hi Shallu,
    Thanks for sharing this great post.
    Yoga and meditation really bring a lot of positive change in human mind set. I am practicing it for the last 8 years and the results are just awesome.
    Gratitude is also the best method to stop complaining about the things in our life. I think Rhonda Byrne’s “The Magic” book can be a great start for anyone, who wants to know more about it and want to practice it in life.

  10. Nice point to improve upon, Complaining is one of the important quality which separates winners from others and very nice techniques were suggested to win upon on it. Thanks for such a wonderful article.

    By the way, the hulk pic was really awesome, even the swan one was good as well, adding value to the content.

  11. Complaining is therapeutic, we do feel good complaining about things, be it the politics, cricket or state of the nation in general. It would be so much better if instead of complaining we could all be a bit more positive and contribute to help make things better.

    Meditation can help us all (speaking from own personal experience) in looking at things in positive light. Just give it a shot it really works.

    Great article BTW.

  12. lol, meditation and yoga will really help to stop complaining and rather start appreciating, people should learn to always see the good side of every situation no matter whether it comes good or bad. It will help you understand things better.

  13. Really people most of the time complaining but if they start appreciate other persons for good things and ignore bad things then we can make strong and happy relations with others. This also gives smile and happiness to us. Good work Shallu Agarwal.

  14. Hey Shallu,

    Thanks for sharing.

    Very useful article for everyone and they must follow it in their life to achieve success. Many people I see are always complaining about their problems, but they should take that problems as opportunity and then life will be easy.

  15. Hey Shallu,

    Thanks for sharing.

    Very useful article for me and I recommend all to must follow it in their life to achieve success. Many people I see are always complaining about their problems, but they should take that problems as opportunity and then life will be easy.
    To be honest this is very helpful for me. thanks again

  16. Hi Shallu,

    I am so glad I read this article, because frankly this is exactly what I needed to read today. It’s true that today’s generation is obsessed with complaining rather than looking for solutions or simply having a better and positive attitude.

    Thanks for this!

  17. Just like all days… one more helpful and brilliant post I found. If we want to save our relationships then we should stop complaining. Complaining and blaming is becoming the major cause of all relationship troubles which leads to breakups, divorces etc. So, why not we stop complaining.

    Thank you, for sharing these valuable points among all of us.
    Keep posting.

  18. Complaining is that activity which came out automatically most of the time when we found ourselves free and have nothing to do. So, if anybody has the habit of complaining then he/she should try to keep himself busy in some kind of activity which help them to stay away from all bad habit even like complaining and all.

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